10 Random Poker Quotes

• You have to piss with the dick you have
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."