10 Random Poker Quotes

• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• "No river, no fish."
• Some days you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue.
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]