10 Random Poker Quotes

• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• "Not all trappers wear 'coon-skin hats."
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• "If i dont make that final table, nobody's gonna remember me next year. If i do make that final table, Im a poker legend overnight" - Dutch Boyd 2003 WSOP Main Event
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers