10 Random Poker Quotes

• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• I don't want to be called a good loser. A good loser is still a loser. -Stu Unger
• I'm just looking for a way to get outa here.... --------Doyle Brunson, goes all-in WSOP2003
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.