10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• Poker is for loners.
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• "I guess the sayings' true. In the poker game of life, women are the rake man. They are the f---kin' rake." - Worm (Rounders, 1998)
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear