10 Random Poker Quotes

• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• If it wasn't for luck, I'd win every hand.
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Ive always like the quote, "Who needs balls when you got the nuts!!!"
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.