10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• I don't want to be called a good loser. A good loser is still a loser. -Stu Unger
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• With all the new poker players I cant play holdem with a pair of gloves
• "I had 2 high." -Sammy Farha
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus