10 Random Poker Quotes

• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.