10 Random Poker Quotes

Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
The next best thing to playing and winning is playing and losing. --Nick the Greek
Poker is a lot like sex. Everyone thinks they know what they are doing, but only a few are actually good at it.- "Dutch" Boyd
i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
I'm a better poker player than I am a player. -RedGrant