10 Random Poker Quotes

• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "See, in my world - the world of high-stakes gin and poker - we play for cold, hard cash. It's all business, pure and simple. Anyone who thinks cardplaying is a 'game' - I'll show you a loser. Money... M-O-N-E-Y. That's how you measure success. One dollar at a time. One chip at a time. That's how you keep score." Stu Unger