10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• "You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em." -Kenny Rogers
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
• Concentrate. Don't do anything stupid. Catch some cards. ----Mrs. Cloutier, as TJ heads out to another tournament