10 Random Poker Quotes

• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• Where's the buffet? -Doyle Brunson
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.