10 Random Poker Quotes

• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• Some days you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Any two cards can lose... and they usually do.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.