10 Random Poker Quotes

• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "Oh give me a break, Ace-eight! I guess some people like getting their money in as a 3-to-1 underdog." -Phil Hellmuth, at the 2004 WSOP
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers