10 Random Poker Quotes

• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• im going to 2 out you to death
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• To win a bit of money, make your opponent think your hand is stronger than it is. To win a lot of money, make him think your hand is weaker than it is. - Josh Avery