10 Random Poker Quotes

• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "you either live by the river or die by the river" why do i always seem to die
• When you win... Rub it in!!! When you lose.. Drink the booze!!!!! Los Altos Dirt Bikers
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."