10 Random Poker Quotes

• "No river, no fish."
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• never rub another mans rhubarb, unless he has the nuts - Jack Nicholson
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• You should pay as much as possible for a free card.
• Fook the floosh droo!
• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare