10 Random Poker Quotes

• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott, "Rounders"
• The next best thing to playing and winning is playing and losing. --Nick the Greek
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs