10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is for loners.
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "Oh give me a break, Ace-eight! I guess some people like getting their money in as a 3-to-1 underdog." -Phil Hellmuth, at the 2004 WSOP
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• I suck, therefore I suck out. North Shore Mike
• "It's hard work. Gambling. Playing poker. Don't let anyone tell you different. Think about what it's like sitting at a poker table with people whose only goal is to cut your throat, take your money, and leave you out back talking to yourself about what went wrong inside. That probably sounds harsh. But that's the way it is at the poker table. If you don't believe me, then you're the lamb that's going off to the slaughter." Stu Unger, three-time WSOP Champion
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.