10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Take my advice and do as you please" - TJ Cloutier
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott, "Rounders"
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.