10 Random Poker Quotes

• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• I'd rather be good than lucky, I'd rather be lucky than lose...
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"