10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• "What've you got, Layne?" "You BEAT." Final table banter between Layne Flack and Mike "The Mouth" Matusow. $ 6,000 No Limit Hold'em Final Day 2004 Ultimatebet.com Poker Classic Radisson Aruba Resort & Casino, Palm Beach
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "No river, no fish."
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em." -Kenny Rogers
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• I'm enough of a dreamer to realize it might have been that elusive something a gambler calls luck. But, I'm also enough of a realist to know that in general we make our own luck - through knowledge, skill and experience.- Doyle Brunson