10 Random Poker Quotes

• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• With all the new poker players I cant play holdem with a pair of gloves
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• when you win its got to make a difference when you lose its got to hurt.
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.