10 Random Poker Quotes

• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Sucking out won't help you. The only cure for stupidity is losing. -- The BRICK --
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.