10 Random Poker Quotes

• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• The greatest feeling is when you've broken your opponent's spirit & crushed his confidence. The fact that you've taken both his bankroll & the shirt off his back is just a bonus. Tom V. (Livonia, Michigan)
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• You should pay as much as possible for a free card.
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson