10 Random Poker Quotes

• If it wasn't for luck, I'd win every hand.
• I'm a better poker player than I am a player. -RedGrant
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"