10 Random Poker Quotes

• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• To win a bit of money, make your opponent think your hand is stronger than it is. To win a lot of money, make him think your hand is weaker than it is. - Josh Avery
• Sucking out won't help you. The only cure for stupidity is losing. -- The BRICK --
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.
• Where's the buffet? -Doyle Brunson
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."