10 Random Poker Quotes

• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• "I guess the sayings' true. In the poker game of life, women are the rake man. They are the f---kin' rake." - Worm (Rounders, 1998)
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Those eggs smell delicious!
• "It's hard work. Gambling. Playing poker. Don't let anyone tell you different. Think about what it's like sitting at a poker table with people whose only goal is to cut your throat, take your money, and leave you out back talking to yourself about what went wrong inside. That probably sounds harsh. But that's the way it is at the poker table. If you don't believe me, then you're the lamb that's going off to the slaughter." --Stu Unger, three-time WSOP Champion
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm