10 Random Poker Quotes

• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Where's the buffet? -Doyle Brunson
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."