10 Random Poker Quotes

• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• in the poker game of life women are the rake
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• No Limit Hold'em - Hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror.