10 Random Poker Quotes

• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• "I could make a crazy call on you..." Sammy Farhah to Chris Moneymaker at the final table when Moneymaker went all in.
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."