10 Random Poker Quotes

• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• God is kind to the underdog! C.A.A
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "Hold em is to stud what chess is to checkers." -- Johnny Moss
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.