10 Random Poker Quotes

• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom
• Some days you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue.
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• I'm a better poker player than I am a player. -RedGrant
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)