10 Random Poker Quotes

• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• Ive always like the quote, "Who needs balls when you got the nuts!!!"
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• "See, in my world - the world of high-stakes gin and poker - we play for cold, hard cash. It's all business, pure and simple. Anyone who thinks cardplaying is a 'game' - I'll show you a loser. Money... M-O-N-E-Y. That's how you measure success. One dollar at a time. One chip at a time. That's how you keep score." Stu Unger
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson