10 Random Poker Quotes

• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• Poker players and police officers have alot in common. Hours and hours of boredom with a few moments of sheer terror.
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?