10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• After taking a beat: "How bad do they play?...This is the World Series of Poker!" -Phil Hellmuth Jr.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.