10 Random Poker Quotes

• A great poker player knows when he is playing poorly.
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT