10 Random Poker Quotes

• You have to piss with the dick you have
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• "you got to know when to holdem, know when to fold em, know when to walk away, know when to run..."
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• I'm too good for you, you might as well flip those 2 cards over.
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.