10 Random Poker Quotes

• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• In the game of life, women are the rake. - Worm
• Some days you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue.
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.