10 Random Poker Quotes

• You have to piss with the dick you have
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• Welcome to kicker school
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• You should pay as much as possible for a free card.