10 Random Poker Quotes

• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• If it wasn't for luck, I'd win every hand.
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• " The commonest mistake in history is underestimating your opponent; happens at the poker table all the time."
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack