10 Random Poker Quotes

• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• If it wasn't for luck, I'd win every hand.
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• "I'd rather be lucky than good" - Lefty Gomez
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• Kiddie games down the street! -- mike matusow
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris