10 Random Poker Quotes

• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• Poker is a lot like sex. Everyone thinks they know what they are doing, but only a few are actually good at it.- "Dutch" Boyd
• "Not all trappers wear 'coon-skin hats."
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• when you win its got to make a difference when you lose its got to hurt.
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.