10 Random Poker Quotes

• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz