10 Random Poker Quotes

• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• "I'm broke one day and have a fortune the next day, and I don't give a damn" --Jack "Treetop" Straus--
• I guess if luck wasn't involved, i'd win every tournament -Phil Helmuth