10 Random Poker Quotes

• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester