10 Random Poker Quotes

• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• "Take my advice and do as you please" - TJ Cloutier
• With all the new poker players I cant play holdem with a pair of gloves
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• Fook the floosh droo!
• "I guess if there weren't luck involved, I'd win every time." -Phil Hellmuth