10 Random Poker Quotes

• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom
• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• Great poker players are separated from good poker players not by how they win their hands, but how they lose them.
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.