10 Random Poker Quotes

• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• Any two cards can lose... and they usually do.
• "I guess the sayings' true. In the poker game of life, women are the rake man. They are the f---kin' rake." - Worm (Rounders, 1998)
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• There is less luck involved than a bad player thinks there is, and there more luck involved than a good player will admit there is
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.