10 Random Poker Quotes

• The best feeling in the world if flopping the nut straight against two players acting before you who both flopped sets. I'll take my chances against 5 outs.
• "See, in my world - the world of high-stakes gin and poker - we play for cold, hard cash. It's all business, pure and simple. Anyone who thinks cardplaying is a 'game' - I'll show you a loser. Money... M-O-N-E-Y. That's how you measure success. One dollar at a time. One chip at a time. That's how you keep score." Stu Unger
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Nobody would play the game if the best hand always won. -Will Schwarz
• "I'm broke one day and have a fortune the next day, and I don't give a damn" --Jack "Treetop" Straus--
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• Poker is a lot like sex. Everyone thinks they know what they are doing, but only a few are actually good at it.- "Dutch" Boyd
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.